Purrfectly Royal (The Mysteries of Max Book 13) Read online

Odelia placed the carrier next to her and strapped it in, while Gran did the same with Dooley’s, and Chase took care of Brutus and Harriet. The pilot announced over the intercom we were cleared by the tower for takeoff, and suddenly my heart started beating so fast I thought it was going to hammer straight through my chest. The engines roared and the plane started moving, then accelerating, with such a mighty roar I suddenly felt awfully faint.

  “Max!” Dooley said. “I don’t like this!”

  “I don’t like it either, Dooley!” I cried.

  “We’re all gonna die!” Brutus said. “This is the end. We’re dead!”

  “This is what hell looks like,” said Harriet. “We’ve landed in hell!”

  The plane hurtled along the runway, at an ever-increasing speed, the noise thundering in my ears, and then, suddenly and without warning, we had liftoff! Without even realizing it, I was screaming at the top of my voice and so were Dooley, Harriet and Brutus.

  “Nervous flyer much?” asked Angela with an amused smile.

  Odelia had opened the carrier and now hugged me close.

  Gran and Chase followed her example, and I could tell Harriet was digging her claws into Chase’s thighs for he grimaced and gently removed them.

  “It’s all right, you guys,” said Odelia. “Everything is fine.”

  “Easy for you to say!” I said. “You’re not the one whose guts are being ripped out by Mach speed!”

  She laughed. “What do you know about Mach speed?”

  “I’ve seen Top Gun! And I don’t feel the need for speed!”

  The plane was still climbing, but then gradually leveled off.

  “The seatbelt sign is switched off and you can now move freely about,” a sonorous voice boomed through the intercom.

  I glanced around as everyone got up and deposited us to the floor.

  “Max?” said Dooley.

  “Uh-huh?”

  “We’re alive!”

  I laughed. “Whoo-hoo!”

  “You guys!” Harriet cried. “We’re on our way to England!”

  “Yes, we are!” I said, relieved to have survived the ordeal.

  “We’re going to meet the Queen!” she yipped.

  I didn’t know about that, but whoever we were going to meet, it was definitely better than meeting our maker!

  Chapter 7

  Odelia was checking the shaky footage again of the incident that had led them to board a private jet and fly head over heels to England.

  They were well underway, the cats had all settled down on the plush pillows Angela or Mr. C. Looney had been so good to provide, and a flight attendant had brought out snacks for them to nibble on.

  Once again she watched as Tessa stood smiling in front of the wall of Newtmore House, as Prince Dante’s voice warned her to watch out! Moments later, Tessa jumped clear of the stone ball that would have crushed her.

  “Tessa and Dante were in charge of the annual Summer Show,” Angela explained. “Some kind of county fair, with a bouncy castle for the kids and a band and lots of great food. Ticket sale proceeds go to charity and Tessa especially had spent a lot of time turning it into a success, which it was.”

  Odelia replayed the footage. The ball impacted the ground with such force that a dull thud could be heard, followed by Dante rushing in and helping Tessa up.

  “If Dante hadn’t yelled for her to jump, she would have been crushed,” said Angela with a grim twist of the lips.

  “And you still think he might be behind this,” said Odelia. “That doesn’t make sense, Angela.”

  “It does. The way I see it, they just had this big fight over the kind of people he likes to hang out with. Bunch of losers, if you ask me, but he seems reluctant to remove them from his life. Putting Tessa in harm’s way and being the one to save her life would have shifted the balance of power in the relationship to him.”

  “That seems far-fetched.”

  Angela threw up her arms. “I don’t know what to think here, okay?”

  Odelia studied the fleeting image of the figure on the roof. Unfortunately it was impossible to make out features or even size or gender. Just a dark blob, moving away the moment the camera caught him or her.

  “Whoever this is, they took an awfully big risk,” said Odelia.

  “I’m sure they were wearing a disguise—a cloak or something.”

  “I take it Dante never saw this video?”

  “No, he hasn’t.”

  “How determined are you to keep this from getting out?” asked Chase.

  “Tessa wants to keep it quiet, and I agree. If word got out there was an attempt on her life, all hell would break loose.”

  “So maybe that’s a good thing? I mean, someone could have seen something.”

  But Angela shook her head. “We want to keep it under wraps. Tessa is not popular as it is, and this would only incite more hatred and all sorts of nastiness. What she’s most afraid of is that a bunch of copycats will pop up and act out other assassination scenarios, this time with fatal consequences.”

  “I can’t believe the English people would tolerate that kind of behavior,” said Odelia. “She is married to one of their most popular royals, isn’t she?”

  “Oh, I guess she’s popular enough with the people,” Angela agreed. “But she’s hated by the tabloids. They’d twist this into something else entirely.”

  “Like what?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. They’d probably claim she set this up herself. As a publicity stunt. A way to get attention.”

  “No way.”

  “Oh, yes. They’re vicious like that.”

  “That’s just terrible,” said Odelia.

  She couldn’t imagine having to live like that—being openly hated and despised with such intensity and relentlessness. “At least the other royals are there to support her,” she said. And when Angela gave her a dubious look, she said, “They do support her, don’t they?”

  “Not really. Her sister-in-law isn’t exactly taken with her, and as far as the rest of the family is concerned—they’re all a bunch of pretty cold fish, if you ask me. They’re not very big on warmth and human affection.”

  They all stared at Angela, even the cats.

  “Like I said,” Tess’s mother continued with a shrug, “the better policy here is not to trust anyone. Which is exactly what’s keeping Tessa safe right now.”

  “So you think they will try again?” asked Odelia.

  Angela’s face turned grave. “Oh, they already have.”

  “Oh, my God,” said Odelia, bringing a distraught hand to her face.

  “Tessa has a habit of drinking a cup of herbal tea before going to bed, and usually she makes it herself—as she has done all her life. Only lately, what with the baby and her busy life, she’s been trusting her staff to handle stuff like that. Last night, when she took a sip from her tea, she noticed a strange taste. Bitter. She immediately thought back to the incident with the stone and my words of caution. So she put down the cup, and poured some tea in a small flask. The rest she dumped down the sink. So when the maid came in later, it looked as if she’d drunk the whole cup. She then asked Nesbit to have it tested. Tessa texted me just before liftoff. The tea was laced with belladonna.”

  Odelia’s jaw dropped. “That’s a pretty powerful poison.”

  “It is. So do you see what I mean about not trusting anyone? Someone made that tea for her—someone close to her—someone on her own staff.”

  “But if they poisoned her tea, who knows what they’ll do next!”

  “You have to get her out of there,” said Chase. “You have to get her back to the States and make sure she’s out of harm’s way.”

  “But that’s just it. I can’t. She’s married to a prominent royal. She can’t just skedaddle and disappear for a while. She has to carry on as if nothing happened. And that’s where you come in. You’re going to have to be there—on the scene—and find out who’s doing this to her.”

  “Are you sure Tessa can
trust this Nesbit guy?” asked Odelia.

  “He’s the only one she can trust. There’s absolutely no reason for Nesbit to try and hurt his cousin. And it’s good for her to see a friendly face in a sea of hostiles. You have to remember, she’s all alone out there—she left behind her family, her friends, her whole life, to go and live with a person she only met months before, and a bunch of strangers, in a high-tension situation, scrutinized by the world and the world’s toxic media. She’s in a tough spot.”

  “And? What has Nesbit learned so far?”

  “A lot. For one thing, there’s plenty of people who want her dead. He’s made a list.” She handed a piece of paper to Odelia. “I thought it might help you get started.”

  Odelia glanced down at the list. She was surprised to find half a dozen people there. “All of these people want Tessa dead?” she asked.

  “Oh, I’m sure there are plenty more, but you have to start somewhere.”

  Chapter 8

  To our not inconsiderable surprise we weren’t staying in a hotel, or even some faraway cottage located down the road from the royal dwelling, but in the actual royal dwelling itself. Odelia was as surprised as we were when we finally arrived at destination’s end and it turned out to be Newtmore Cottage.

  “We’re staying here?” asked Odelia when the car pulled to a stop in front of a slightly weird-looking cottage with a very huge chimney stack on top.

  “Yup,” Angela confirmed. “I’ve arranged for you to stay here, so you can keep a close eye on my daughter.”

  The car doors opened and the humans all got out. We were still in our pet carriers, which apparently was a precaution our driver had insisted upon. The carriers were taken out of the car and placed on the porch.

  The front door opened and a red-bearded young man came out whom I immediately recognized as Prince Dante. He looked extremely pleased to see us. “Angela!” he cried, then threw his arms wide and greeted her with such affection I found it very hard to believe he was the one we were here to nab.

  Behind him, a young woman appeared. She was smartly dressed in a white cable-knit sweater and black pants and looked absolutely radiant. She was carrying a baby in her arms, and greeted her mother with genuine warmth. When it came time to greet the rest of us, she didn’t stint either. “Cousin Odelia!” she said and gave Odelia three kisses. “It’s been too long!”

  “Yeah, far too long,” Odelia agreed.

  “And this must be Chase,” said Tessa, greeting Chase. “I’ve never actually met Odelia’s husband,” she explained for the sake of her own husband.

  “Hey there, mate,” said Dante, giving Chase’s hand a vigorous shake.

  “And this must be your dear, sweet Gam-Gam,” said Dante, eyeing Gran with a twinkle in his eye. “I’ve heard so much about you, Gam-Gam!”

  “Well, ain’t that swell,” said Gran, enduring a hug from the prince.

  “It’s been too long, Gam-Gam,” said Tessa now, giving Gran a one-armed hug while hoisting the baby higher against her chest. “How have you been?”

  “Oh, can’t complain,” said Gran cautiously.

  “And how is Gum Gum?” asked Dante. “Still a dodgy old codger, eh?”

  Gran narrowed her eyes at Angela, whom she seemed to blame for this ordeal, then plastered a fake smile on her face. “Gum Gum is great. Still chasing skirts and getting hammered in bars.”

  Angela cleared her throat and stepped forward. “Why don’t we show them their rooms? I’m sure they’ll want to get freshened up before going to bed.”

  “Going to bed?” asked Gran. “It’s nine o’clock.”

  “Midnight here, Gran,” said Odelia. “The time difference?”

  “Oh, great,” said Gran. “So they just stole five hours from me?”

  “Nobody stole five hours.”

  “You’re young—you don’t understand. Wait till you’re my age. Five hours makes a big difference.”

  “And these must be your lovely cats,” said Tessa, eyeing me with affection.

  “Yup. These are my babies,” said Odelia.

  “Odelia has always been a cat lover,” Tessa explained for the sake of Dante. “Even when we were little she would take in strays and feed them behind her mom’s back.”

  “That’s me,” said Odelia. “The stray cat lady.”

  “We better take them in,” said Gran. “We don’t want them to catch a cold.”

  I had to admit it was a little chilly in England, or at least a lot chillier than over in the States. Then again, this was an island, and aren’t islands usually colder than the mainland? Clearly I was ill-prepared for this trip. I should have studied that travel guide more closely!

  Everyone filed into the cottage and then… promptly forgot all about us!

  “Um... can someone please get us out of these damn boxes!” Brutus yelled.

  The car had left, and the cottage door had closed, but we were still out there.

  “They forgot about us,” said Harriet, summing up the situation nicely. “Can you believe that?”

  “I can believe it,” said Dooley, “because I’m living it.”

  “I have to tinkle,” I announced.

  “Tinkle in your box,” Brutus suggested.

  “I want to tinkle in my litter box.”

  “Newsflash, Maxie, baby. They didn’t bring our litter boxes.”

  “What do you mean they didn’t bring them? I need my litter box.”

  ‘They probably want us to tinkle in the bushes,” said Dooley, glancing around. Darkness had fallen and the sounds of the night pierced the silence.

  Owls were hooting, twigs were snapping, and critters were scurrying.

  Just then, the front door opened and a strange-looking creature shuffled out in our direction. He looked like a dog, but I wasn’t sure he was a dog. He had one of those weird faces, with the snaggleteeth and the flaps of superfluous flesh dangling all over the place. Almost as if he used to have a face at one time but it had gotten scrambled up in a cement mixer somehow.

  “So you’re the cats, huh?” said this strange creature.

  “That’s right,” I said. “And what are you?”

  “I’m Fluffy,” the creature said gruffly.

  “What are you exactly, Fluffy?” asked Harriet with a look of distaste.

  “I’m a dog, of course. What did you think I was?”

  “Oh, I’m not sure,” she said. “Celebrities keep all kinds of weird pets these days.”

  The creature laughed loudly, indicating it possessed a sense of humor. “You’re funny, cat!” Then the laughter stopped, and the face was wreathed in a mournful expression. “People have called me ugly. Do you think I’m ugly?”

  “Of course not,” I said. “You’re just… special.”

  “If you have to know, I’m an English bulldog.”

  “Of course you are,” I said.

  “Could you do us a favor, Fluffy?” Harriet asked. “Could you go and fetch your master and tell her to get us out of these boxes and into the house?”

  “Oh, sure,” Fluffy said, and instantly turned on his heel—or was it her heel?—and returned indoors. There was loud barking, and moments later Odelia came hurrying out.

  “I’m so sorry, you guys!” she said. “I must have fallen asleep.”

  “Lamest excuse ever,” Brutus growled.

  “I know, right? I thought I closed my eyes for only a second but it must have been minutes. Must be that dreadful jet lag.” She quickly opened the snaps on our boxes and finally we were free again!

  “I have to tinkle,” I announced. “Please point me to my litter box.”

  “You’ll find everything you need inside,” she said with a smile and a pat on my head. “Tessa has made arrangements for you guys and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.”

  We followed her in and then into a room off the kitchen, and the moment I set paw inside I saw she hadn’t lied: four litter boxes stood lined up against one wall, with a row of bowls against the other
, and the scent wafting in from those big bowls told me this vacation may not have gotten off to a good start, but from here on out it was only going to get better and better. And better.

  Chapter 9

  Odelia was impressed with the cottage. When she’d heard the word cottage it had brought to mind something cute and small and romantic, but maybe also a little musty. The first image the word had elicited was the cottage Kate Winslet lived in—and Cameron Diaz moved into—in The Holiday, still one of her favorite holiday movies. But Tessa and Dante’s home wasn’t so much a cottage but a big house. There were several very spacious bedrooms, a large living space with open kitchen and a large office. The whole thing had been recently renovated, and looked more like an upscale hotel than an old cottage.

  It was all very nicely done. The room she and Chase had at their disposal had a luxurious ensuite bathroom, and was itself the size of a small apartment.

  Tessa explained that the cottage used to be four different units, where four different people lived. Now it had been converted back into a single-family home with space for guests and family to come and stay when they wanted to.

  “This place is amazing,” Odelia told Chase as she tucked a suitcase under the bed. She’d finished unpacking and had time to admire their surroundings.

  “Yeah, it definitely beats that tiny cottage Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz house-swapped in The holiday,” he said.

  “Jinx!” she said. “I love that movie!”

  “Yeah, for a chick flick it’s not bad.”

  She slapped his shoulder and together they rolled onto the big bed. It was one of those boxspring affairs she loved so much, and the sheets were high-thread-count Egyptian cotton. “So how are we going to do this?” she asked.

  “Well, obviously we’re going to have to be very circumspect,” he said, placing his hands behind his head. “If no one is supposed to know about what’s going on here, it’s going to make our work that much harder.”

  Chase was a cop, and for a cop things were pretty straightforward. You identify your list of suspects, you interrogate those suspects, and you try to figure out the truth. When you’ve selected the most likely suspect, you lean on them until they fess up and that’s it. The rest is up to the legal system.