Purrfect Secret Read online

  I have to admit, though, that no matter how hard I stared, it didn’t affect the others one bit or deter them from gobbling up all of my food. And when they’d finally polished off my last bowl, they all had drops of milk stuck to their beards, crumbs of Cat Snax decorating their whiskers, and Fancy Feast Seafood stuck to their lips.

  Ugh. What a way to start the day.

  Chapter 2

  Odelia was staring out into the backyard, where her grandmother was digging holes into the ground, presumably to plant some of the bulbs she’d acquired. When Gran first moved in she’d mentioned how the backyard looked like a wasteland and that someone ought to do something about it. So now, since she didn’t have a lot to do, she’d just decided to dig in and do it herself.

  Problem was, Odelia liked her backyard just fine. She liked grass. She liked how low-maintenance it was. And she liked the few rhododendron bushes she’d planted near the back, because all she needed to do was prune them from time to time, deadhead them, and sit back and enjoy the riot of color come springtime.

  And now Grandma was determined to turn her backyard into some sort of garden of Versailles! There was even talk of installing a water fountain, a rock garden, and a fish pond!

  Odelia didn’t know the first thing about fishes, or the dozens of plants Grandma had gotten at the garden center and was now transferring to the soil. They’d probably all need a lot of work to maintain, as would the fountain and the fish pond and its dozens of fishes.

  She shook her head, still dressed in her Hello Kitty PJs, sipping from the coffee Grandma had made—extra-strong, just the way the old lady liked it—not so much the way Odelia liked it. And it was then that she noticed her cats seemed to be arguing about something.

  “What’s up, guys?” she asked, popping a slice of bread into the toaster.

  She frowned when Max suddenly jumped up onto the kitchen counter, something he never did.

  “Max?” she said when he gave her a look of annoyance. “What’s wrong?”

  “They’re eating my food,” he whispered.

  She leaned in. “What was that? I didn’t catch that.”

  “They’re eating my food!” he hissed, gesturing with his head to the four cats who sat licking and grooming themselves.

  And true enough, the bowls were all empty.

  “Oh, right,” said Odelia, and automatically reached into the cupboard where she kept the cat food and started filling up those bowls again.

  “No, don’t do that!” Max hissed, and she moved closer.

  “Aren’t you hungry, Max?” He rarely refused his food, and then only when he was sick. “Are you coming down with something?”

  “Yes, I am! It’s called Milo and it’s worse than swine flu or flesh-eating bacteria!”

  She smiled. “Max, I told you it’s only for a little while. Now please be nice to our guest. Sharing is caring, after all.” When Max produced a strange sound at this, like steam escaping from a pipe, she gave him a closer look. “Are you sure you’re not coming down with a bug? If you want I could call Vena. She does house calls, too.”

  “No!” he yelled, horrified. “No, it’s fine.” Then, resigned, he added, “I’ll handle it.”

  And he hopped from the counter, a defeated air about him.

  Cats. Sometimes they had a hard time making new friends. Then she got a bright idea. She moved to the TV nook and turned on the TV, then fiddled around with the remote for a moment, flipping through the Netflix menus until she hit on the one she wanted.

  This should do the trick.

  “You guys!” she yelled. “Come in here for a moment, will you?”

  Five cats came trotting up, Max the last one to join the small troupe.

  On TV, an episode of Kit Katt & Koh was playing, the new Netflix show that was such a big hit. It told the story of Kit Katt, a regular young woman from a small town who worked as a reporter for the local newspaper and could talk to her cat Koh, who fed her bits of news he picked up from his feline friends. Almost as if the show’s creators had taken a long, hard look at Odelia’s own life!

  “Ooh, it’s Kit Katt!” Harriet cried happily as she hopped onto the leather couch.

  The others quickly followed suit, and Odelia watched on as her cat family settled in for the duration of the eppy. They all loved Kit Katt and especially the funny and feisty Koh.

  Just then, her phone belted out the latest Dua Lipa hit and she hurried to the kitchen, where she’d left it on the counter. Her toast had popped and she took it out and placed it on a plate while she pressed the phone to her ear.

  “Yeah, Chase.”

  “Hey, babe. You’re up early.”

  “Grandma,” she said, only needing one word to make her meaning clear.

  “I feel your pain,” said Chase. “If it’s any consolation, I’ve got a case for you—and a hot tip straight from the front lines.”

  “A murder? In Hampton Cove? No way.”

  “Way. Does the name Dick Dickerson mean anything to you?”

  “He’s the editor of the National Star, right? The supermarket tabloid?”

  “He’s also dead. Killed in a pretty creative—and gruesome—way, I’m afraid.”

  “You want me to join you?”

  “Please. Your uncle is out of town for a couple of days, so I could use a hand.”

  Odelia’s uncle, a widower, had recently met a woman. She worked for Dos Siglas, the famous beer company, and traveled the country handling the company’s PR and overseeing the shooting of their equally famous ‘Most Fascinating Man in the World’ commercials.

  “I know. He told me. He and Tracy are going hiking in the Appalachian Mountains. Tracy’s company owns a cabin out there, where they often put up executives and guests.”

  “For some reason I never pictured your uncle as the hiker type,” said Chase, and Odelia could hear the smile in his voice.

  “He’s not,” said Odelia, also smiling. Uncle Alec was easily three times as big as she was, and had probably never worked out a day in his life. In fact he’d smoked like a chimney until only recently, and his cholesterol levels always made his brother-in-law, Odelia’s dad, who was a doctor, give him that unhappy look doctors like to give their worst patients.

  “He must like that woman a lot, to give up a lifelong habit of being a couch potato.”

  “Yeah, he’s smitten,” said Odelia, who was happy that her uncle, whose wife had died years ago, was finally ‘playing the field’ again, as they said. Even if there was only one woman on that field as far as Alec was concerned. “She’s nice,” she added. “I like her.”

  “I like her, too,” said Chase. “So are you game, Poole?”

  “Count me in, Kingsley,” she said.

  “Pick you up in five. Oh, and you better bring a clothespin,” he said before hanging up.

  Chapter 3

  Watching Kit Katt and Koh and their adventures was all fine and dandy, but doing it under duress was not. For one thing, Milo clearly wasn’t familiar with the etiquette involved in watching a TV show as a family. He kept getting up and moving about, then returning and sitting in a different place each time. And what was more, he kept accidentally stepping on the remote and pausing the show or even switching the channel. And the worst thing? He wasn’t even doing it on purpose I didn’t think. It was almost as if he couldn’t help himself.

  “Sorry, dude,” he muttered when he suddenly planted his butt on my tail, then, when I extracted myself, started drumming his paw against my back for some reason!

  His behavior was frankly driving me up the wall. So when he’d stepped on my toes for the third time, I snapped, “Will you just sit still for a second?”

  He merely grinned up at me, then said, “Chill, dude. It’s only a stupid show.”

  I gasped in shock, and so did Harriet, who was a big fan of Kit Katt and her handsome sidekick Koh. “Only a stupid show!” I echoed. “This is Kit Katt we’re talking about, Milo!”

  He shrugged, now lying on his b
ack and balancing his paws in the air. “Whatever.”

  “It’s only the best cat show ever!”

  “Yeah, it’s not like there are a ton of great cat shows,” said Brutus. “Dog shows? Too many to count. But cat shows? Nah. Almost as if Hollywood doesn’t care about us cats.”

  “Yes, you’ve got your Lassie, you’ve got your Boomer and you’ve got your Benji, but no cats. What’s that all about?” Dooley added, clearly also a Kit Katt & Koh aficionado.

  “Simple,” said Milo, now sticking his butt into the air and wiggling his tail. “Cats can’t act. Dogs, on the other hand, can.”

  There were collective gasps of shock now, all of us staring at Milo like he’d just committed sacrilege, which he had. “Take that back,” I said.

  “Take what back?”

  “That cats can’t act.”

  “But it’s true! Dogs can be taught to perform all kinds of tricks, which makes them the perfect actors. Only cats aren’t so easy to instruct. Hence the lack of cat shows.”

  I was shaking my head. This was crazy talk. “You’re wrong,” I said vehemently.

  “Actually he kinda has a point there, Max,” said Brutus. “Cats are difficult actors, and we all know how Hollywood feels about difficult actors. They get sidelined.”

  I couldn’t believe this. Cats are a superior species. Everybody knows that. Compared to cats dogs are nothing. We have the better reflexes, the bigger brainpower, the greater charm, the works! “What about Tom and Jerry?” I said. “That’s a lot more popular than Lassie ever was.”

  Milo gave me a strange look. “Tom and Jerry is a cartoon, Max.”

  “So?”

  “So there are no actual cats involved,” he said slowly.

  “Oh,” I said, never having given this minor little detail a great deal of thought. “Well, I like Tom and Jerry,” I said stubbornly. “Even though Tom is something of a loser.”

  Well, he is. What cat worth its salt keeps getting bested by a silly little critter?

  The doorbell rang and immediately Milo jumped from the couch, where he’d been counting his belly hairs, and streaked off in the direction of the door.

  “Poor Milo,” said Harriet. “He probably thinks it’s his human, here to pick him up.”

  “He doesn’t,” I scoffed. “He probably thinks it’s the pizza guy with fresh food.”

  Harriet gave me a slightly critical look. “Why are you being so mean to Milo, Max? He means well. And it’s not his fault he’s here, having to miss his home and his human.”

  “Oh, please,” I said. “He’s like the guest you don’t want. Like Owen Wilson in You, Me and Dupree. He looks like an angel but deep down he’s just a spoiled little brat.”

  “Maxie, Maxie,” said Brutus now, shaking his head. “How would you feel if Odelia handed you over to some stranger, and you suddenly found yourself having to share another cat’s food, being at the mercy of a human you never met? Huh? Put yourself in his paws for a moment. Have a heart.” He patted my chest. “I know it’s in there somewhere.”

  That was rich, coming from Brutus. It wasn’t that long ago that he’d been that cat, coming in here with his swagger and his bullying ways. Just like Milo.

  “I don’t like him,” I said decidedly. “And there’s nothing you can say that will make me change my mind.” The others were all staring past me, and my heart sank. “He’s right behind me, isn’t he?” They all nodded, and I slowly turned. I was right. Milo was behind me, giving me a sheepish look.

  “Some big dude is at the door. I think he’s a cop?”

  “Chase Kingsley,” said Brutus knowingly. “He’s my human.”

  “Way to go, buddy,” said Milo. “He looks nice.”

  “Yeah, I don’t see him all that much,” said Brutus. “I practically live at Odelia’s mom’s these days. They shipped me around for a while but I’ve decided to settle here.”

  “I’ll bet you can relate, huh, Milo?” I said, trying to lighten the mood. “Being shipped around from human to human. Ha ha.”

  But Milo wasn’t laughing. Instead, he was picking at the couch cover with his nails, his eyelids flickering nervously. “Uh-huh,” he said finally. “That’s right, Max. You got my number, buddy.” And then he promptly turned on his paw and padded off.

  “Max!” Harriet said, and directed a reproachful look at me. “You’re so mean!”

  “Yeah, you’re behaving like a first-rate bully, Maxie,” said Brutus.

  Coming from a former bully of bullies that was the last thing I needed to hear!

  Still, I felt a bit bad about the whole situation. No idea why, though, as I knew I was right and Milo was wrong. I mean, he was the intruder and I was the intruded, right?

  Chapter 4

  The episode of Kit Katt ended and Brutus and Harriet drifted off into the backyard, probably to stare at Grandma while she dug more holes. Cats love to watch humans dig holes. No idea why. Probably so they can pick up a few ideas on skill and technique.

  “Hey, buddy,” I said to Dooley. “You’re awfully quiet. Something wrong?”

  He shrugged. “Have you ever felt superfluous, Max?”

  I was surprised Dooley would even know a big word like that. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean that Harriet has Brutus and Brutus has Harriet. You have Odelia and Odelia has you. Even Milo has his human—even though she’s not here right now. But who do I have?”

  “You have Grandma,” I said. “And she has you.”

  He stared off in the direction of the garden, where Brutus was now giving Grandma a few tips on how to dig a hole by using her hands instead of that silly-looking shovel. “Grandma doesn’t care a hoot about me, Max. In fact I don’t think she ever did.”

  “I’m sure that’s not true. Grandma loves you—she loves all of us.”

  “No, she doesn’t. You know what she said to me the other day? That I shouldn’t sleep on her feet. She said she’s too old to have cats sleep on her feet. She also pushed me away when I tried to dig my nose into her armpit this morning. Said I was being silly and she was too old for that nonsense.” He shook his head. “I’m telling you, she’s getting ready to take me to the pound, Max. I can feel it in my bones.”

  “Now don’t you talk like that, Dooley,” I told him. “That’s crazy talk. Maybe Grandma is acting a little weird lately but that’s just because she’s in a fight with Tex and Marge.”

  “She’s in a fight with Tex and Marge and she’s decided she doesn’t want me anymore,” he said sadly.

  Grandma had worked for her son-in-law Tex for years and years at Tex’s doctor’s office. But since Tex and Odelia’s mom Marge had protested Grandma’s attempt to move away and go and live with the rich family of her ex-boyfriend Burt Goldsmith, Gran had moved out of their house and into Odelia’s, and now things were very tense all around.

  “I’m sure everything will go back to normal soon enough,” I said. “Besides, Odelia is pretty much your human, too, right? She loves you just as much as she loves me.”

  “In my experience humans can only love one pet, Max,” said Dooley somberly. “And since she already has you, there’s no room in her heart for anyone else.” He sighed deeply. “No, looks like I’m humanless.” Then he cast a forlorn look at me. “At least I still have you, Max. You’re my best friend, and you’ll never leave me, right?”

  “Of course I’ll never leave you,” I said, rubbing my friend’s noggin with my furry knuckles. “Best friends forever, right?”

  “Right,” he said, a glimmer of hope lighting up his features. “So you won’t mind if I permanently move in with you?”

  I know I should have said yes wholeheartedly, so I don’t know where that slight hesitation came from. Maybe from the fact that I was on edge with this whole Milo business. Or maybe because Dooley kinda took me by surprise. Fact is, I flinched. And Dooley saw that. And his expression hardened, and without another word he stalked off.

  “Dooley!” I yelled. “Come back here! Of cours
e you can move in with me, buddy!”

  But he was already gone.

  I felt eyes burning into my back so I turned. Milo was staring at me. Then he smiled. “Looks like you need a new friend, Max. Why don’t you let me be that friend from now on?”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, pensive now.

  He strode up to me and placed a paw on my shoulder. “You look sad, Max. And no wonder. Your best friend just walked out on you. But not to worry. I’ll be your new bro.”

  I gulped. A strange sensation was gnawing at me. A sense of foreboding. Then I stomped down on the sentiment. Harriet and Brutus were right. Milo was my guest. I needed to be nicer to him. Hospitable. Kind and understanding. So I relented.

  “Of course,” I told him. “From now on my milk is your milk and my Cat Snax are your Cat Snax, Milo. And you’re welcome to stay under my roof for as long as you like.”

  His lips slowly curled up into a smile. “I knew you’d warm to me, Max. I just knew it. You’re an old fogey, and old fogeys sometimes need time to adjust. But from now on we’re besties. Besties for life.” And he held up his paw, so I placed mine against it. And when he went low, I went low, too. But when we paw-bumped, I had a sinking feeling something was terribly wrong with this picture.

  And I didn’t even know the half of it yet.

  Chapter 5

  True to his word, Chase showed up right on the dot. Odelia grabbed her purse, took one final glance at her grandmother puttering away in the backyard and stepped out.

  Chase pressed a quick kiss to her lips, then took a firmer hold of her, dipped her down and laid a real smoocher on her.

  When he returned her to perpendicularity, she was swooning a little. Great way to start the day!

  “And hello to you, too,” she said, following him to his pickup, parked at the curb.

  “You’ve got your grandmother to thank for that,” he said with a grin.